OMG Don't Hate Me!

Dear Cat:


I don't know what to say, and you know me, that is something like, totes unheard of!  All I remember was I was chewing on a rawhide chip (those are like, my favorite-ist things EVER) and you walked up to me.  Remember, I told you before I have some food aggression issues and I don't like it when you try to touch my food while I'm using it?  Well BOO-ya bitch, you believe me now!?  Ahem...I'm sorry, I don't know where that came from.


Anyway, there's no excusing my behavior, and I am so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so sorry!  I really hope I didn't hurt you, because if I did I would be so sad!  I feel just TERRIBLE!  See?  Look at my face: I'm heartbroken.  I know you like smelling me and my food (and I don't know why, exactly, but as people say, "different strokes for different folks" or something like that), so I'll try super duper hard next time to control myself, I promise!


Let's work things out,
Dog


P.S. - I also think I might have heard you call me a 'fatty' while I was enjoying my rawhide, but that must have just been my imagination, right?